Feeling lost and uninspired with your career? Ask yourself the following questions…

We spend a large portion of our days, weeks, and lives at work, to the point where, often, the time we spend on developing our careers and businesses outweighs time with friends and families.

This isn’t necessarily negative; hopefully our work supports us to live with meaning. But, sometimes, we may not feel aligned to our role, or valued by our employer, or feel positively challenged by our job. Perhaps, our values no longer match with the organisation we work for, or the lack of career progression may be holding us back.

As with all areas of life, things can change. Our ambition might outgrow the current role we have at work.

Maybe we are returning from maternity leave with a renewed sense of identity, perhaps we have a new manager who doesn’t support our career ambitions, or we realise that a 50-hour working week isn’t for us anymore. It’s common to have these thoughts, and to feel out of sync with our working life for some time before we review and act towards change. Job security and financial stability can outweigh the possible risks that come with a career move, and we can start to feel ‘stuck’ instead of curious.

But the pandemic has created a shift in workplace culture, and the changes towards flexible working have provided new opportunities, reduced commuting, and minimised office politics for many. As a life and career coach, many of the clients I work with share thoughts on wanting to make a positive impact through their work, wanting to feel more fulfilled, and to have more of a balance between work and home.

As with all big life decisions, it is important to move through the fear that we first notice, and into a place of open-minded possibility. So, ask yourself these five questions that can help you to reconnect with your career path and purpose.

1. Is your work ‘meaningful’ right now?

Having a sense of purpose in our work keeps us motivated and allows us to feel connected to something bigger than ourselves. What do you love most about your role right now? Assess how your company’s values align with your own personal ones. Make a note of when you can influence positive change in your projects. Recall the colleagues that inspire you, who share your vision for a supportive work environment.

2. Is your current role making you feel valued?

Knowing that we are making a difference, and that our time and contributions matter, is how we feel fulfilled. Reflect on recent feedback, and note the contributions you have been thanked for. Assess where and how you enable your team and organisation to achieve objectives – does this make you feel proud? Being appreciated helps our motivation. Who is championing you and sees your potential?

3. What new skills are you learning through work?

Our capacity for learning is endless, and each opportunity for growth taps into our potential. Access to learning and development keeps us engaged and motivated, whether this is through formal learning, observing, or saying ‘yes’ to new experiences. Does your curre

When a loved one is struggling, it’s natural to want to help – but sometimes trying to fix the problem causes more harm than good

If you’re anything like me, your natural instinct, when faced with a problem, is to fix it. Figuring out the root of the problem, untangling it and finding a solution is incredibly satisfying, but something I’ve learnt time and time again is that not every problem is fixable (and not every problem is my responsibility to fix).

This is especially true when a loved one is struggling with their mental health. A big part of me wants to fix it for them. After all, I’ve written about mental health for nearly 10 years, I have mental health first aid training, I have coaching training – surely I can help, right?

And yes, I can help... to a degree. Having this knowledge is helpful. Having an understanding of mental health and knowing where to find professional support is useful.

The issue comes when I jump into ‘fix-it’ mode when the truth is, mental illness isn’t always fixable and it isn’t something we can do for others. In my experience, trying to ‘fix’ something isn’t only a little useless, it can even be harmful. When you’re constantly offering solutions, it can make the person opening up to you feel like they’re simply not trying hard enough, which isn’t the case.

As I continue to work on my own desire to find solutions, these are the tools I’m using to support, without trying to fix.

Listen, actively

If you’re a fellow ‘fixer’ you may notice when a loved one is telling you about what they’re going through, your mind is racing with ideas that could help. This can pull you out of the moment and actually stop you from fully listening. Active listening is a tool that helps you stay present so you can really hear what’s being said.

The Samaritans share a brilliant acronym to help with this: SHUSH

Show you care
Have patience
Use open questions
Say it back
Have courage

Learn more about these tips and listen to Samaritan’s Lucia Capobianco on our podcast, I am. I Have.

Ask how you can best support them

This is a question I learnt to ask early on in my current relationship. When my partner was going through a tough time and talking it through with me, I would offer solutions and didn’t understand why he didn’t seem responsive. Eventually, I asked, “How can I best support you?” And he told me all he wanted was for me to listen, say “Yeah, that sucks” and give him a hug. Sometimes we just need to be held and told we’re not alone.

Of course, everyone is different, and people may want different things on different days, so try to ask this regularly. If the person says “I don’t know”, remind them you’re there for them and consider signposting.

Signpost to further support

While we may not be in a posi

When things get tough, bring yourself back to the moment with these essential tips

We all experience anxiety or stress at different points in our lives. It’s a normal and natural response to difficult times, and it can help us to take action when we need to. Sometimes, however, we can get stuck in anxious thoughts and feelings, to the point where it feels overwhelming. Grounding is an easy, practical set of techniques that I teach my clients, which can help to restore some balance to your day.

When we are anxious or stressed, our nervous system goes into ‘fight or flight’ mode. Our ‘back brain’ (the amygdala and limbic system), takes over, and our bodies are flooded with hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol. We might feel our heart rate increase, have repetitive thoughts, or general feelings of fear or anger. Grounding soothes our fraught nervous system and brings our prefrontal cortex, or ‘front brain’, back online so we return to the present moment, and are able to function.

So, how do you do it?

1. Breathe!

My absolute top tip for grounding is to concentrate on your breathing. It might sound obvious, but I teach people every day how to breathe properly, and the results can be amazing. The key is to focus on the exhale, not the inhale. This lets your body know that it is safe, and brings calm quickly. Try a simple count, like inhaling for four seconds, and exhaling for seven, to keep you focused. Also, be sure to inhale into your diaphragm. The simplest way to do this is to imagine you are blowing up your belly like a balloon when you breathe in.

2. 5-4-3-2-1 sensing

This exercise is great for bringing your attention to your body, and helps you to feel more centred as you tune-in to the physical, and away from any difficult thoughts. Start by saying five things you can see out loud. It might be objects in a room, or a detail about a blade of grass. Next, say out loud four things you can feel. Notice sensations such as your feet on the floor, or your hands on your knees. Pick up an object and feel it fully. Now say three things you can hear. Noises outside, inside, a ticking clock, your own breathing. Then two things you can smell, perhaps a waft through the window, or your own clothing. Finally, say out loud one thing you can taste. If you have a sweet or snack nearby, pop it in your mouth and savour it fully. Finish by noticing how you feel, usually you can appreciate a sense of being ‘back in the room’.

3. Mind games

A great technique for bringing your ‘front brain’ back online is to complete mental exercises. These can also have the added bonus of distracting you from worrying thoughts and feelings. My favourite one is to count backwards from 1,000. Other examples you could try are spelling the names of your family members backwards, counting all the things you can see in your room that are a certain colour, naming as many films, books, or countries as you can that begin with a certain letter, or picking an object and describing it mindfully using all of your senses.

4. Body shaking

Another one that’s great for tuning-in to the physical, this exercise is also helpful for releasing and relaxing muscles that have become tense due to a stressful day. Start by standing up straight, feet hip-di

When temperatures peak, our wellbeing can suffer. Here are five tips for taking care of your mental health during heatwaves

There are a lot of pros when it comes to hot, sunny weather. It’s a chance to get our vitamin D levels (a really good mood booster), to slow down, and to get outside. But, when the thermometer tips over a comfortable point, and we don’t have an easy way to cool off, we can find ourselves feeling flustered, sluggish, and irritable.

So, what can we do to make sure that we take care of our mental health during heat waves and hot weather? Try following these tips:

1. Consider your medication

Certain types of mental health medications – tricyclic antidepressants and antipsychotics, including amitriptyline, imipramine, doxepin, mianserin, and trazodone – can impair the part of the brain responsible for temperature regulation. This can mean that you’re more at risk of overheating, and so should take extra precautions in hot weather. If this applies to you, it’s always worth checking in with your GP or mental health team.

In the same vein, medication generally needs to be stored at room temperature – which is about 25°C – and can start to lose potency if the temperature drastically exceeds that. Generally, most medications will make it through heat waves without a problem, But watch out for changes in colour, taste, or structure, and if you’re in any doubt reach out to your pharmacist.

2. Stay hydrated

You probably didn’t need us to tell you that you need to drink more water when it’s hot, but did you know just how important staying hydrated is for our brain function? Drinking enough water has been linked to lower rates of anxiety and depression, but it can also help you stave off brain fog, and help you stay more alert – with studies showing that just being dehydrated by 2% impairs things like memory and focusing on your daily tasks.

3. Understand your feelings

You’ve probably experienced it yourself, but studies have shown a link between hot weather and heightened emotions, particularly anger and hostility. The heat can interfere with the processes that regulate our mood, and we may find that we respond to things in ways we wouldn’t do normally – such as snapping at loved ones, road rage, and quickly escalating disagreements.

If you’ve noticed this is happening, you’re well on your way to taking control. By identifying that we’re not behaving in a way we would normally do, we’re able to take a step back and really assess the situation and put it in perspective. Try to communicate with those around you, let them know that you might be more prickly than normal, and try to keep your cool if you notice others going through the same thing. This could be a good time to amp up your self-care practices or to vent in a journal.

4. Try to get some sleep

Trust us, we know it’s easier said than done, but when we’re not getting enough

When the world feels overwhelming, it’s easy to fall into a scroll hole. Here we look at some alternatives

The news at the moment is… a lot, right? Both in the UK and globally there seems to be terrible thing after terrible thing unfolding and it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by it at times. In a group chat with friends recently we admitted we’ve been doomscrolling more, and it seems we’re not alone.

Recent research from Bupa has found a 247% increase in Google searches for ‘terrible morning anxiety’, increasing significantly since the start of 2022, and experts believe doomscrolling has a part to play.

I can certainly relate - scrolling first thing in the morning can be an easy way to peak anxiety and start the day off on a sour note. Here, we share some tips to help you stop doomscrolling, and the thing I’ve found the most helpful in changing my own habit is replacing it with something else.

So, what can we do instead of doomscrolling for a calmer morning? I’m glad you asked...

1. Read uplifting newsletters

This is my current go-to. It still involves reaching for my phone (so it doesn’t feel too different to my beloved scrolling habit) but it’s more intentional. I go straight to the newsletter folder in my email app and have a read. The trick here is to ensure you’re subscribed to newsletters that leave you feeling inspired. Some of our favourites include Emma Gannon’s The Hyphen, TED recommends and, of course, Happiful.

2. Scroll a happier feed

Social media can be a positive place to scroll, we just may need to do a little tweaking. Have an audit on who you’re following and let go of those accounts that don’t make you feel good. If you’re on Twitter, why not make a list full of accounts that feel like sunshine? If you’re on Instagram, curate your ‘following’ feed and head straight there.

3. Read something beautiful

Sometimes we need to fill our brains with something beautiful to counteract the doom. Pick up a book of poetry or essays that helps you see the good in the world. I loved Ross Gay’s Book of Delights - the perfect antidote to doomscrolling.

4. Meditate

When overwhelm creeps up, our minds crave space. Instead of filling it with fear by doomscrolling, try opening up a little whitespace. Meditation can be a great tool for this, or even just taking a few slow breaths. This can calm our nervous system and give us a moment of pause before launching into our day.

5. Make something

Being creative and making something is a brilliant way to lift your mood. Boosting confidence and giving you a sense of achievement, making something mindfully can also help ease stress. Draw a pattern, add a stitch to your sewing project, write a piece of flash fiction, anything to get those creative juices flowing.

6. Answer these questions...

Whenever I