20 ‘and/but’ statements to immediately halt negative thought spirals

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'And/but' statements are designed to help you reframe your feelings, and take an objective, practical approach to problems. Here, we’re sharing 20 examples

20 ‘and/but’ statements to immediately halt negative thought spirals

Two things can be true at once. It sounds like a basic concept, but it’s something that can often go out the window during times of stress and self-deprecation. For example, have you ever made a mistake and spiralled into a negative thought cycle before, ultimately, concluding that you’re a bad and undeserving person? If so, ‘and/but’ statements could be the tool that you’re looking for.

These statements are designed to help you recognise that we are not our negative thoughts, we are not our mistakes or our shortcomings. We are complex people, with perfectly reasonable needs, reactions, and emotions. To create them, you simply make a statement that sums up the problem and then add ‘and’ or ‘but’ to qualify it with a second that puts it into perspective or offers some reassurance. They can also function as affirmations, reminding you of a truth, belief, or value you have.

Once you’ve got your head around how to formulate them, you’ll likely want to start creating ‘and/but’ statements that are unique to your own situation, and your specific needs. But, here, we’ve gathered together examples for a range of scenarios, each designed to ground you during moments of heightened emotions.

Workplace

‘I am a valued member of the team, and I do not need to take on every project.’
‘I made a mistake, but that doesn’t mean I’m bad at my job.’
‘I am dedicated to my job, and I also need to rest.’
‘I get nervous before meetings, but I’m still in control.’
‘I am capable and knowledgeable, and sometimes I need support.’

Parenting

‘I enjoy being with my family, and sometimes I need a break.’
‘I sometimes feel like I don’t know what I’m doing, but I can ask for help.’
‘I feel others judge me, but I can set boundaries if I need to.’
‘I feel guilty when I can’t balance everything, but I’m trying my best.’
‘I am a capable and confident parent, and sometimes I need support from others.’

Relationships

‘I love spending time with my partner, and I love time alone.’
‘We don’t always have to agree, but we always respect each other.’
‘My relationship uplifts me, but I’m still my own person.’
‘I feel frustrated by their actions, and we can come to a resolution.’
‘I am devoted to my relationship, and I make time to pursue my interests.’

Emotions

‘I experience strong feelings, but I am in control.’
‘I feel negative emotions, and that’s OK and normal.’
‘I feel overwhelmed, but I can take a step back if I need to.’
‘My emotions are real and valid, but they won’t last forever.’
‘Sometimes things go wrong, and I am working on myself.’


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Cinnamon Apple Cobbler

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Sweet and juicy, loaded with fresh apples, and just the right hint of spices, this apple cobbler is a fall and winter dessert favorite that we enjoy throughout the entire year.

apple cobbler with ice cream in oval dishes

Easy Apple Cobbler

Cinnamon, sugar, and apples, warm fragrant and bubbling from the oven is one of the most nostalgic aromas for me. I have yet to find a candle that mimics this scent perfectly. So I will just keep making baked apple recipes on repeat to keep the kitchen smelling amazing and feeling cozy.

It is entirely up to you whether or not you choose to peel the apples for this cobbler. I’ve enjoyed it both ways and the peels don’t bother me a bit. I’m all for saving time and effort in the kitchen whenever possible, so I choose not to peel the apples most of the time.

You’ll start this recipe by slicing the apples thin and drizzling some lemon juice over them. Sprinkling them generously with cinnamon sugar and nutmeg.

Stir to coat all of the apples with the spices and then transfer them to a greased baking dish. It’s okay if the dish appears to be very full initially. The apples will shrink down a good bit during the baking process.

cinnamon spice apples in white square baking dish

To make the cobbler topping, I use a cheese-grater to “grate” the cold butter. That is my favorite hassle-free way to cut in the butter. It takes just a moment and I think it’s simpler than the more traditional methods.

If you choose not to use the grater, simply cut the cold butter into small pieces and then blend it into the flour mixture, using a pastry blender or your fingertips.

Toss the grated butter in the flour mixture. Stir with a fork to mix throughout. Stir in the boiling water, just until combined, leaving plenty of little lumps of butter.

Health and fitness books women should read in 2023

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Sharing some of my top health and fitness book recommendations for women in 2023! Please chime in with your faves and top suggestions in the comments section.

Hellooooo friends! Hope your morning is off to a lovely start. I’m getting in a quick Sculpt Society workout and then heading into the day’s to-dos.

When I set my big reading goal a couple of years ago (at least 3 books per month: 1 fiction, 1 nonfiction, and 1 related to health/wellness in some way), it expanded my book horizons and I enjoyed some very powerful reads.

In today’s post, I wanted to share some of my current favorite health and wellness books, and I would love to hear about ones that you’ve loved and would recommend to others, too.

Health and fitness books women should read in 2022

Eat Smarter

Shawn Stevenson is my #1 favorite podcast host, so I was obviously excited to read this one. It also far surpassed my expectations. As you can probably guess, I’ve read a lot of “diet” and health books in my life. Some have been cringeworthy to the max, while others have inspired me to make positive changes in my personal routine and share new knowledge with clients. This is one of those books! I love that he goes into the science and the WHY behind his recommendations, and shares tips and strategies for fueling for longevity and optimal health. I also appreciate the fact that many times he mentions that diets shouldn’t be one size fits all. It’s up to you to experiment with different strategies and find the methods that resonate best with your unique body.

With his funny one-liners and conversational way of explaining some intense science-y stuff, Shawn shares optimal foods and how they impact our sleep, hormones, longevity, and fat loss. The book also includes a 30-day sample meal plan and recipes. I only wish that the book had more recipes!

The Cancer Revolution

I picked up a copy of The Cancer Revolution because I follow Dr. Connealy on Instagram and LOVE her account. She shares so much valuable info, and I think it’s fascinating to be able to follow someone who treats cancer frequently, and successfully. She uses a blend of alternative and traditional therapies, including IV vitamin infusions, oxygen therapy, red light, detox strategies, and sauna, in addition to low-dose chemotherapy. I wanted to read this book because I’m all about empowering myself with extra tools and information, and found so many valuable resources in this book for preventing cancer, treating cancer, potentially helpful

The new office working week: The pros and cons of remote working

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As we reflect on 2022, we take a look at the new office working week and the benefits that coaching brings for those working remotely

The new office working week: The pros and cons of remote working

Since the pandemic, the way we work has changed dramatically. With the majority of businesses and employees forced to operate remotely, we’ve seen a shift in attitudes toward working from home and its benefits, both for business and employee wellbeing. And it’s fair to say that things have changed a lot over the last few years here at Happiful, too.

As we enter a new year and look back at 2022, one trend that stands out is the idea of the ‘new office working week’, but what exactly is it? Recent research has revealed that a typical working week in the office now runs from Tuesday to Thursday, with many of us opting to work from the comfort of our own homes on a Monday and Friday - perhaps in an attempt to drag our weekends out for as long as possible.

With just 13% of people heading to the office for the last working day of the week, it’s clear that Thursday has become the new Friday, but what impact does this have on our wellbeing, and is it here to stay?

Aside from the obvious benefits like saving money on transport, whether that’s on fuel or train fares (this being particularly valuable in the current cost of living climate), there are a number of wellness and business benefits to hybrid working. It’s worth noting, however, that this approach to work doesn’t suit everyone, nor is it practical for all professions.

Let's take a look at some of the advantages of working from home:

Increased productivity

Whilst some people can struggle to find the motivation to work from home, for many, it can actually increase productivity as there are fewer distractions from the often trivial office matters. Home working means we can have total peace and quiet so that we can really focus and be present with our work. To add, many businesses are now adopting ‘flexible hours’, meaning you can work at times that best suit you and when you’re most productive.

Work/life balance

For those of us trying to balance work with busy family life, remote working gives us that extra chunk of valuable time that we’d typically spend commuting to be with our loved ones. What’s more, it allows more time to get things done around the home, attend appointments, etc. meaning you can really relax into your evening and recharge, ready for the following day.

The added ability for employees to have more autonomy and freedom in deciding how they plan their working day creates more trust between them and their employers, increasing job satisfaction.

Lessening your carbon footprint

Not only does hybrid or fully remote working cut down on transportation costs, but it also reduces your carbon footprint. Whilst doing your bit to help the environment, you’re also contributing towards a greener future.

Employee engagement

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Slow Cooker Split Pea Soup with Ham and Potatoes

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With a rich ham flavor and a balanced combination of potatoes, leeks, and split peas, this slow cooker split pea soup is a very pleasant surprise.

split pea soup in pottery mug with bread

Ham and Split Pea Soup with Potatoes

My husband loves split pea soup. I tried making it for him several times when we were newly married and every time prior to this, I was unimpressed. Even as a child, split pea soup was my least favorite soup.

Finally, as an adult, I’ve found a split pea soup I don’t just like or tolerate but really truly love. This slow cooker split pea soup is made with leeks, ham, and potatoes and it just might be the best split pea soup you’ll ever taste.

Slow Cooker Split Pea Soup

When I stumbled on this rainy day split pea soup several years ago, I decided to give split pea soup another chance.

Lucky for us, I had a ham bone in the freezer already (leftover from Christmas dinner) so I made this split pea soup with that ham bone in the crock pot that same day, making this a super easy meal to make with what I had on hand.

I could tell even before I ladled the split pea soup into bowls that this recipe was a winner. The fragrant garlic and simmering split peas filled my kitchen with the most delicious smell as the soup cooked.

ham and potato split pea soup in white bowls

Then, I took a bite and discovered just how delicious split pea soup with ham and potatoes can be. Chunks of tender baby red potatoes, onions, and leeks swim in creamy split peas that are cooked in a garlicky broth that is richly flavored with ham.

Each and every spoonful of this crockpot split pea soup was more delicious than the last and it’s become one of our favorite soups over the past ten years. A few years ago I never would have guessed that I’d become such a fan of split pea

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