The topic of suicide is incredibly sensitive, and distressing to discuss, but it’s only by breaking the stigma that we can bring the subject into the light, and ensure those in need get help as soon as possible

Suicide isn’t an easy topic to talk about, but many of us have been impacted by losing a loved one or friend, or know someone who has. That’s why it’s so important that we talk about it together. Here’s what I have learned though my work as a psychotherapist, clinical supervisor, critical incident debriefer, and survivor of multiple deaths by suicide in my family, and of my beloved best friend. Please take care of yourself as you read this, as you may get triggered.

Suicide isn’t a new idea; the intentional ending of one’s own life has been practised throughout human history. It is a deeply evocative and provocative subject, and one unique to humans, so it’s not surprising that researchers clearly want to know the why, in order to answer questions about human cognition, and to understand free will and choice. Those left behind, also wondering why, want to make some sense of their bewilderment and devastation.

The World Health Organisation estimates that there are more than 700,000 completed suicides each year around the world. In the UK, the Office for National Statistics reported a total of 5,224 deaths by suicide in England and Wales in 2020 (75.1% males). For every completed suicide, many more are attempted, and this is the single most important risk factor in future attempts.

Suicide is often the end point of a journey; an accumulation of experiences, related thoughts and feelings that result in a fatal choice. Ultimately, the fact is, each individual is precious and unique, with their own experience of the world and, try as we might, we may never pin-point why they took that path, even if we had the capacity to retrace every moment of their lives.

I want to offer some definitions of suicide so that we can have a framework to use.

Suicidal ideation is generally defined as thoughts about engaging in suicidal behaviour – wanting to cause intentional, intended, and fatal self-harm. Feelings vary from mild to severe (mild thoughts that come and go and which are very common, to severe, i.e. having a clear plan). This can change from one extreme to the other within hours, or between one day and the next.

Para suicide refers to engaging in highly risky and dangerous behaviours with absolute disregard for one’s own safety, or that of others. Examples include dangerous driving at excessive speeds, excessive drinking, drug overdoses, and picking fights despite the dangers involved.

Suicide is the deliberate intent of employing one or more means to end one’s own life. Individuals with a history of previous failed attempts have been shown to have a significantly higher likelihood to end their lives through suicide.

Impulsive suicide is often driven by extreme feelings in relation to major adverse events, such as a sudden (unexp